It's one of 'those' weeks. I'm sure we all have them in some shape or form, unique for each of us. I've been in what I call a phunk for a while. It's not that I'm depressed, or sad, or unwell. If anything I would describe it as reflective, maybe a little down...but for some reason I'm always very self critical when in this moon and it never usually ends well. It's very destructive as I loose motivation and find myself very sensitive and emotional. Someone said something to me this week, which was a) totally true, and b) not meant in an unkind way; and yet it cut me so deeply it feels like it's ricocheting around inside of me doing damage on the way. I'm not cross with them at all, but I can't seem to stop the path of destruction.
If I try my hardest to put on my reasonable head, I know there are a few things going on at the moment that are making me much more sensitive about my body image at the moment. That at any other time I could quite possibly have laughed off the comment and not given it much more thought. Definitely a straw that broke the camels back sort of situation.
So what can I do...well I'm off to the gym tonight. My attempts to get to the gym this week have been derailed and because of our various commitments our gym nights cant really be flexible, but Dan has let me have tonight at the gym so I can at least get there once! Will also try to get a spot in the creche on Friday for possibly a second session. A kick up the bum is possibly in order? So if anyone sees me in the next few days, youre welcome to have a swift kick (hey I've got plenty of padding :) )
Anyways, give it a few days and I'm sure normal optimistic service will return. Till then, kick away!
